What is an artist?  What is like to live as an artist?

To me an artist feels and sees deeply into their inner life.  Is willing to take risks, be open and vulnerable, expose oneself to slings and arrows ... and yet ... NEED to create, to bring forth from deep within.  To express your unique version of art that is cajoled and seduced from within to make an appearance in the outer world ... requires a fierce heart which protects the more fragile heart while losing nothing in the translation.  

Art is the hardest work I have ever done.  It has brought me the most frustration and the most rewards of anything I have ever done.  It helps me process and work through things, it mirrors for me and shows me different aspects of myself.  I paint women so it makes it very personal work for me.  Art helped me work through the loss of my husband and the grief that felt insurmountable.  Art is my therapy, my religion, my joy and has changed my life and given me a life.  I hate to think where I would be now without art ... we all need art.

Why is art important for the world?

Art holds transmissions from the soul. It shares from the depths. Image is the purest form of communication, words can't get in the way or be misunderstood.  Art heals, it is a salve for the world.

Artist:  Jackie Morris - East of the Sun and West of the Moon

Love Letter to Myself

I love you
How often do
I tell you
I see you?
as you were
and as you are
in all stages
and the in-betweens
when you were confused
felt so all alone
you wanted
so desperately
to be loved
to be held
to be comforted
just for someone
to care
to know that you exist
to see you

When you felt undeserving
unlovable, flawed
as if your life
was jut a mistake
that you didn't belong here
that you made
no difference
being in the world
I was there whispering
I love you madly
the times you wanted
to leave it all
I hugged you fiercely
screaming that is
just a lie
don't believe it
the worlds needs you
just the way you are
I see you as
perfection
a work of art
in progress
trust the process
there's a lot more art
for you to create

I haven't posted on my blog since just before my husband died.  I wanted to share some of the art I did since his passing to help me process the grief and to honor my love for him.  He was my biggest supporter and I know he still watches me paint and inspires some of my decisions as he did in life.

This painting is called "The Guardian" and she is very comforting to me and lets me know that we are never alone and are always love and watched over.

This one is Spirit Bear.  I originally called it "Going in for Courage" and it also allowed me to work through the loss and grief with the bear for strength and the full moon for power.

Sharing more art ….

I am doing a series of Frida paintings because I feel such a connection to her and her passion.  She was a woman ahead of her time, adventurous, fiery and creative.

Restoration

Loving myself means

gathering up all 

the bits of me

I left behind

disowned

ran away from

turned my back on

ridiculed

bullied

taunted 

shamed

condemned

judged

locked in a box

buried it deep

The bits of me 

someone else didn’t like

or approve of

or think was good enough

I traded ME

for conditional acceptance

for conditional love

that is temporary at best

until they find

the next thing they want different

that isn’t quite 

what they want me to be

or look like

or act like

I am reclaiming myself

stepping up and out

looking within

fueling the fire of self love

creating a roaring bonfire 

feeding it with the old

self sacrifice

chameleon-like behavior

I gave away my power

because who was I

to be ME?

I place the crown of Self Sacrifice 

onto the bonfire 

and watch it turn to ashes

I claim my sovereignty

gathering my power to me

wrapping myself in self acceptance

I place the crown of Love 

upon my head

and reclamation is mine.

Art is a Gift you Deserve to Give Yourself

I love this painting because it reminds me how creativity was natural as playing when I was a child.  Somewhere along the way when comparison and judgment stepped in, I told myself I was no good and put away my artistic dreams.  

This painting was my affirmation that I am loved, I am heard, I am seen, I am safe, and I am Artist!  

I have used art for therapy and inspiration, and to work things through, and as a way to do satire and humor as well.  

  

Art to feed my soul and comfort my heart:

Art to remind me about the magical and whimsical moments of life:

I can't imagine my life without art anymore.  You can see that one image is worth 10,000 words because it is holds so much feeling, and is open to interpretation which can be different for each person who views it.  Every painting tells a story and I like to combine writing or poems with the painting which brings new dimensions in and connects the left and right side of the brain which results in greater creativity.

It also allows you to access parts of yourself you wouldn't meet otherwise.  It is going within and bringing image back out with you.  Images that are unique to you that allow your soul to communicate with you.

Just play with some doodling even with pencil and paper until you can get some crayons or colored pencils, or colored Sharpies, watercolors, brushes, whatever.  Just start somewhere and leave the judgment outside and give it something to do, like pull weeds while you play.

I'm going to check back with you ... I'm off to do some chores so I can get back to my easel and work on my creative life ... it offsets all the other things you have to do in life ... it's a reward!!  Have fun and play like you remember how.

You may have noticed my long absence from my blog and I apologize because I had told myself I would write at least once a week and between painting, finishing up classes, starting new classes, creating a website, and endless details ... I let my blog slide.

The excitement this week is that my art teacher Shiloh Sophia McCloud is in New York this week and addressed the United Nations Commission on the Status of Women on March 4, 2013.  She presented a slideshow that featured 42 artists from Color of Woman Method and we each had three of our paintings included.  It was so exciting to see our art go out into the world to help show the healing power of art.

You can just make out an image from the slideshow on the wall behind her.  We are all so inspired by this amazing woman who has touched our lives so deeply.  I started painting about two years ago and had no art background at all.

Art has really changed my life on so many levels.  I miss my dining room because it has become my studio and is so full of my art supplies, canvases, paints, brushes, watercolor paper, and I have run out of room on my walls for my art so many are sitting on the floor stacked against each other.  I need to get my art out into the world because I have a small house and it is full of women on canvas.  My husband loves being surrounded with all the women though so that's really good news.

Anyway I am feeling so super charged and excited about the potential for this work, Color of Woman Method, to reach out to women and girls and allow them to discover the healing potential of creating art.   My head is swimming with ideas and I'm trying to decide if I want to start teaching classes or if I want to create video online classes or just paint and write.  It has been a bit overwhelming trying to learn all the technical aspects but I have learned a lot in the process.  So I will keep you posted and in the process keep myself posted ... writing helps you find out what's going on with you in your life.

 This is Sophie Rose and I just love her.  So here's to healing the world with image and love.

 So much more to come ... so much to share and play with.